New life begins ...

Over the last 17 years or so, this grapefruit tree has taken a beating ... a couple of hurricanes, some bad trim jobs, some rough weather ... in the Fall, I really was beginning to wonder if the grapefruit tree in the backyard would come back after this Winter ... it has started looking pretty rough as the years have gone on ... as I was leaving today, I saw that new life has sprouted ...

Must just be God's reminder to me that sometimes things have to get bad before they can get better ...



I'm going to take a better picture of this later, but to get the idea out of my head, I took a pic on my phone, then did a quick edit in Color Splash to highlight the color of the fruit ... it's going to be hard to get a good pic with the power lines in the way, but I'm going to try and make it work!

Raindrops are falling ...

So the other day I spent my lunch break in my car, watching the rain come down around me. I actually had a really good cry while sitting there. I wasn't sad, depressed, upset or anything ... it was just a release ... this move is overwhelming, amazing, scary, joyous and intense ... I'm finally moving on ... I've wanted it for years ...

... my dreams are coming into focus ...

Really Chaz Bono? Really?!?

A year into his gender transition, Chaz Bono tells CNN's Anderson Cooper 'I was never a lesbian, I just looked like one.'

http://www.cnn.com/video/?/video/bestoftv/2010/03/12/ac360.chastity.to.chaz.cnn&hpt=P1

I didn't realize that "lesbians" all had a certain look??

Way to perpetuate the stereotypes!!

It's much easier ...

... to quit a job when your boss is an a**hole ...

... quitting a job where everyone is really nice, accomodating, kind and welcoming is really hard.

I'm not going to dwell on that though ... I'm going to look forward to the exciting new things happening in my life and remember this year of my life fondly.

I wish I were tired ...

I think I may really have insomnia.

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There's a song in my head, but I only know a blurry version of the lyrics ... hopefully it will come to me ... the snippets of the song I know seem rather appropriate ... *ugh*

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AHA! FOUND IT!

Packing up 27 years in 4 weeks ...

I've been offered a position in NYC, and once I get the official offer letter in the mail, I'll be resigning from my "perfectly good" job and leaving my "perfectly good" house in search of something that surpasses "perfectly good" ... happiness.

It has been my dream to live in NYC since I was 22 years old. I fell in love with Manhattan the minute I stepped foot out of the car during my first trip up there. Lucky for me, it's the city that Jami found a grad school in, so I will be in the city that I love and have a woman that I love there too.

Day 1 of packing was difficult. Actually, most of the process thus far has been pretty hard. I cry when I come across pictures or memories. Today's difficult moment came when I found the journal that was out at my mom's memorial service where her friends wrote their favorite memories. She was so loved, and is missed so much, even today. A bold woman who didn't take no for an answer and enjoyed life.

It's time for me to enjoy my life. Titusville isn't my dream. I mean yeah, I have a good job that I could easily work at for years to come, but it doesn't fulfil me. I've been there almost a year. Yes, my Excel skills have improved, and I've had a lot of time to read about some interesting topics online, but I don't feel like I've had a useful year.

I have come to realize a few things ... life is too short to be miserable. I'm letting go and sitting back to enjoy the ride. Whatever happens, happens and I'll land on my feet regardless.

God didn't make me this resilient for nothing.